One of the best excuses I have received was an honest one, I
am hungover and you don't want me in the office today, gotta
love a bit of honesty, wonder if there are some more creative
ones out there?
My Dog Ate My Excuse
By Melissa Lourenco | May 30, 2010
Aussie Rules
BNET Australia Contributors
Biography
BNET Australia Contributors
Brian Haverty is editorial director for CBS Interactive Australia and is responsible for the company's BNET and ZDNet Australia sites.
Robert Gerrish is a coach, author and professional speaker and the founder of Flying Solo, an Australian online community for solo business owners.
Melissa Lourenco is the HR manager for CBS Interactive in Australia.
Chris Golis is the author of The Humm Handbook: Lifting Your Level of Emotional Intelligence. He runs seminars and workshops on EQ.
Suzi Dafnis is Community Director of the Australian Businesswomen's Network.
Yvonne Adele helps organisations build a culture of ideas by teaching people at all levels to access their untapped creative thinking skills.
This blog post is a follow up from my last post about absenteeism which is costing Australian businesses mountains of money.
I thought it would be interesting to gather up some of the weirdest and wackiest reasons for not turning up for work. You just have to Google the subject and you’re bombarded with a bunch of websites that have pages and pages on the subject.
I’ve listed a few below (some from other websites and some directly from my own experience). Did they actually happen? You be the judge.
- I’ve locked myself in the house and I can’t find the keys
- I found an ant infestation in my house and sprayed too much Mortein and the fumes have made me sick
- I can’t walk because my feet got sunburned
- A fly flew up my nose while I was asleep and now I have difficulty breathing and I feel dizzy
- I’m going to be a couple of hours late because an elephant has escaped from the circus down the road and it’s fallen asleep across my driveway
- I haven’t been sleeping well — I have proof, my iPhone app “Sleep Cycle” shows that I didn’t sleep
- I’m a non-smoker but I had a nicotine overdose — my brother thought it would be a good prank to put a nicotine patch on while I was asleep. I woke up vomiting and with cold sweats
- A champagne bottle fell on my head
- I’m on my way home because I got attacked by a street performer for giving him the wrong coin and trying to get it back
- I burned my fingers and hair using my hair straightener this morning and I can’t type
- My dog chewed the alarm clock cord
- I sneezed and threw my back out
- I’m calling from the police station — I sleepwalked into somebody’s house and got in someone’s bed
- My dog peed on the stairs and I slipped
We’d also like you to tell us the wildest reasons for taking a day off you’ve ever heard. The best three responses (judged by our own BNET AU Panel) will receive a copy of Dale Carnegie’s Leadership Mastery: How to Challenge Yourself and Others to Greatness, pubished by Simon & Schuster.
More from “Aussie Rules”
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BNET Blogger
RE: My Dog Ate My Excuse
GeorgieTaylor
05/30/2010 07:47 PM
RE: My Dog Ate My Excuse
I was working with a colleague who called in sick one day, which is not a very unique excuse. She failed to mention to my boss at the time, however, that she wasn't just 'sick' she was in fact in hospital undergoing an emergency operation. It wasn't until the next day when she called in sick again that my boss, fuming, called her back to give her a formal warning and found out that she was in surgery.
Greg.Tilney
05/30/2010 09:58 PM
RE: My Dog Ate My Excuse
A very close friend of mine called sick for work on a Monday
because his car (the company's car) has been stolen across the
Canadian border. After spending the entire Monday at the police
station filing the report it turns out the car was towed away
because he parked it in front of a fire hydrant. After paying
some thousands in fines and additional expenses we showed up
to work next day.
because his car (the company's car) has been stolen across the
Canadian border. After spending the entire Monday at the police
station filing the report it turns out the car was towed away
because he parked it in front of a fire hydrant. After paying
some thousands in fines and additional expenses we showed up
to work next day.
arturo1002
05/31/2010 06:03 AM
RE: My Dog Ate My Excuse
In a previous job, one guy said he couldn't come into work because he kicked his flatmate out and so he couldn't leave the apartment as he was afraid they'd return and steal all his stuff. He didn't come into work for an entire week!
Pinkiepoo
05/31/2010 04:52 PM
RE: My Dog Ate My Excuse
The 3rd point actually happened to me unfortunately - many years back being a fresh Pommie to the Australian shores I hit the beach one Sunday and applied sun cream to everywhere; but forgetting the tops of my feet. 5 hours later I realised and by 6pm that evening my feet had swelled to epic proportions and I essentially had third degree burns on the tops of both feet.
I had to spend the next week at home applying special cream to my feet & taking a load of painkillers & antihistamines to reduce the swelling, I simply couldn't put any shoes / trainers / thongs on as the pain was unbearable. The lowest (but funny) point came when I tried to venture out one evening, I got to the top of the street before I had to turn back. Taking my shoes off from the amazing pain and walking barefooted a friendly Aboriginal approached me and asked if he could have my shoes since I wasn't using them!
I had to spend the next week at home applying special cream to my feet & taking a load of painkillers & antihistamines to reduce the swelling, I simply couldn't put any shoes / trainers / thongs on as the pain was unbearable. The lowest (but funny) point came when I tried to venture out one evening, I got to the top of the street before I had to turn back. Taking my shoes off from the amazing pain and walking barefooted a friendly Aboriginal approached me and asked if he could have my shoes since I wasn't using them!
burke_tony@...
05/31/2010 05:44 PM
RE: My Dog Ate My Excuse
Someone called in with a migraine midweek. However, this person all had a Facebook entry at 2.30am that morning boasting to be rather intoxicated, and the person had several senior colleagues as facebook friends. Not smart.
timrichardson
05/31/2010 06:01 PM
RE: My Dog Ate My Excuse
I was honest and admitted I had been in the slammer for climbing the harbour bridge in a toga.
I had a good boss who was a bit of a larrikin himself so didn't mind
I had a good boss who was a bit of a larrikin himself so didn't mind
BillEG
05/31/2010 06:06 PM
RE: My Dog Ate My Excuse
A girl I worked with took 'special leave' (usually reserved for emergencies such as a broken water pipe flooding the house) because her dog had a grass seed stuck under its skin!
fruitcake68
05/31/2010 09:32 PM
RE: My Dog Ate My Excuse
My best and real excuse for being late is that a powerline
cable snapped and fell across our iron front gate and fence
(Sydney terrace house) electrifying them both so I couldn't get
out of the house. I had to wait for the emergency electricity
repair people to come and fix it before I could leave.
cable snapped and fell across our iron front gate and fence
(Sydney terrace house) electrifying them both so I couldn't get
out of the house. I had to wait for the emergency electricity
repair people to come and fix it before I could leave.
Sarahent
06/01/2010 08:32 PM
RE: My Dog Ate My Excuse
This is not really a sickie, but thought I'd share this one after reading the dog excuse above.
One employee once said he'll be running late to work because he went out jogging with his dog in the rain and couldn't leave the house until he dried her off with a towel.
One employee once said he'll be running late to work because he went out jogging with his dog in the rain and couldn't leave the house until he dried her off with a towel.
Pinkiepoo
06/02/2010 06:32 PM
RE: My Dog Ate My Excuse
Thank you all for relating some great excuses! After much deliberation (and a slight delay due to one of our staff judges needing to stay home for a visit from the plumber), we have decided on the following winners:
Hotfoot
The third point actually happened to me unfortunately -- many years back being a fresh Pommie to the Australian shores I hit the beach one Sunday and applied sun cream to everywhere; but forgetting the tops of my feet. Five hours later I realised and by 6pm that evening my feet had swelled to epic proportions and I essentially had third-degree burns on the tops of both feet.
I had to spend the next week at home applying special cream to my feet & taking a load of painkillers & antihistamines to reduce the swelling, I simply couldn't put any shoes/trainers/thongs on as the pain was unbearable. The lowest (but funny) point came when I tried to venture out one evening, I got to the top of the street before I had to turn back. Taking my shoes off from the amazing pain and walking barefooted a friendly Aboriginal approached me and asked if he could have my shoes since I wasn't using them!
Sent in by burke_tony
Friends, Romans, Bridgeclimbers
I was honest and admitted I had been in the slammer for climbing the Harbour Bridge in a toga.
I had a good boss who was a bit of a larrikin himself so didn't mind.
Sent in by BillEG
Facebook Up to the Facts
Someone called in with a migraine midweek. However, this person all had a Facebook entry at 2.30am that morning boasting to be rather intoxicated, and the person had several senior colleagues as facebook friends. Not smart.
Sent in by timrichardson
Congratulations to the winners! If you've been chosen please send your address details to media-au@bnet.com, and we'll send you out the promised copy of Dale Carnegie?s Leadership Mastery: How to Challenge Yourself and Others to Greatness.
Hotfoot
The third point actually happened to me unfortunately -- many years back being a fresh Pommie to the Australian shores I hit the beach one Sunday and applied sun cream to everywhere; but forgetting the tops of my feet. Five hours later I realised and by 6pm that evening my feet had swelled to epic proportions and I essentially had third-degree burns on the tops of both feet.
I had to spend the next week at home applying special cream to my feet & taking a load of painkillers & antihistamines to reduce the swelling, I simply couldn't put any shoes/trainers/thongs on as the pain was unbearable. The lowest (but funny) point came when I tried to venture out one evening, I got to the top of the street before I had to turn back. Taking my shoes off from the amazing pain and walking barefooted a friendly Aboriginal approached me and asked if he could have my shoes since I wasn't using them!
Sent in by burke_tony
Friends, Romans, Bridgeclimbers
I was honest and admitted I had been in the slammer for climbing the Harbour Bridge in a toga.
I had a good boss who was a bit of a larrikin himself so didn't mind.
Sent in by BillEG
Facebook Up to the Facts
Someone called in with a migraine midweek. However, this person all had a Facebook entry at 2.30am that morning boasting to be rather intoxicated, and the person had several senior colleagues as facebook friends. Not smart.
Sent in by timrichardson
Congratulations to the winners! If you've been chosen please send your address details to media-au@bnet.com, and we'll send you out the promised copy of Dale Carnegie?s Leadership Mastery: How to Challenge Yourself and Others to Greatness.
brian.haverty@...
06/06/2010 07:58 PM
